THE BRIDE DRESSED IN RED

2022 

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The bride was dressed in red, which comprised my wedding dress with a long organza fabric train on which I have written my personal reflection about my choice of wedding dress using red-colored sand. This is a reflection on the importance of staying true to oneself and resisting social pressure, particularly in the context of a wedding where traditional expectations can be overwhelming. My decision to choose a non-traditional wedding dress color and style represents my desire to celebrate my marriage in a way that is authentic and meaningful to me, rather than conforming to societal expectations.

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As the hour was finally fast-approaching my wedding day, I needed a dress. Must it be white? Wasn't this somewhat ridiculous at my age? Was I not 36 years old with more than 15 years together with my husband-to-be? I felt my lived dynamic didn't fit the usual symbols, the freshness of age in a young relationship, or the idea of innocent naivety conveyed by gleaming white. As I dwelled further, it became certain these conventions and codified standards weren't me.

 

But I was indeed getting married, and a dress was needed. But if nothing else, it wouldn't be white! The color was excluded, and the quest for the perfect dress remained, which worried me. A social pressure and anxiety that shouldn't exist considering such a special occasion: the moment of joy became heavy. In the end, I kept asking myself, who was this dress for?

 

After removing the white, I said goodbye to volume, silk, tulle, lace, pearls, and frills. I said goodbye to the artifice of princess outfits. How was I to live this shared moment, insincere, encased in doll-like packaging? A trap! I didn't want to seem to be; I wanted to be. Besides, there were only a dozen guests to share this moment. A small number to counter the "dream ideal" of a glorious impersonal wedding. So a resounding "no" to artificiality and "yes" to simplicity. A stuffy, beautiful, long dress? Also, "no," I refused to participate in yet another social cliché—It would be short.

In the end, I found my dress. Simple but glamorous, and above all, red! Red is like passion, red like anger, red like femininity, but also red like love. That was my wedding dress, the union of all these reds just as married life can be.

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